Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Prune juice will not be used in my house EVER. (took place 5/25)

Ever again that is... (this post gets a bit graphic... so be warned)

So Cayley has been running a fever since yesterday which I have been controlling with Motrin, Tylenol, and lukewarm baths. Well this afternoon when I picked her up from the babysitter, I noticed that her stomach was feeling hard. I remembered that this same thing happened the last time she had a high fever for a few days and that she recovered quickly after she poo'd quite a bit... Well me being a super mom genius decided that she must be constipated since I know she hasn't poo'd normally in a couple of days.

*light bulb flashes above my head*

-Hey, prune juice will help her poo! She'll be better in no time!-

So off to the store I go and I get the smallest bottle of prune juice (not very small by the way...) and spend 3.99 on it. When I get home I pour two ounces of juice, three ounces of water and offer it to Cayley. She samples it and doesn't seem to mind the taste too much. I breath a sigh of relief as her and I cuddle on the couch while Jorge and I discuss the possibility of tripping it outside to the store before we get hit by another rain storm. Cayley is more playful now so we figure we should go do what we need to do. I joke with Jorge that we better not forget to bring a diaper, and he retorts that we better bring a few.

All goes well at the store, Cayley falls asleep, my receipt shows that I saved 79.22 (spent 120.00), we are homeward bound. When we got home Cayley was still sleeping so I told Jorge to bring in her whole car seat. He puts the car seat on the table and I start putting our groceries away. He was gone for a while (stuck at OldLadyNeighbor's window when I checked...), so I finished in the kitchen, put some food in the microwave for him and made a bottle of formula for Cayley. As I am walking by the table, I noticed a brown liquid on the place mat under the car seat.
My initial thought was "what is that?", then, "fucking dog threw up again!" and then I was like, "wait a minute... How the fuck did the dog get up on the table??? No, Pepsi doesn't have chunks..."
Oh my lord, please tell me that stuff is NOT from Cayley.
Well... Shit sure enough Cayley is sitting in poo. And not just any poo. Prune juice poo.
I sigh to myself because I already know that I am going to get stuck cleaning this shit... I call to Jorge that he needs to come in the house. Not being very patient two minutes later I call to him that he NEEDS to come in the house. He somehow escapes the clutches of OldLadyNeighbor when he comes in and I inform him that the juice worked. He sees that I am not amused at all...He walks over, looks, and turns around looking horrified. (mind you he has not eaten dinner yet. LOL)I told him he better just take Cayley and her seat and put them in the bathtub.Cayley is awake at this point and is NOT AMUSED. (picture below has poo in it.)











Anyway, I unbuckle her (take a pic), and as I am stripping her down my poo aversion flares up. Fiercely and very quickly. Great, now not only do I get to clean poo, but my reverse dinner of eggs as well... Yay! I manage to hose Cayley down and I need a break from the smell so I decide to take her out of the bathtub. In the process of getting in a position that I can pick up Cayley without toppling over, I step in my upchuck. Then I notice the poo all over the side of the tun and realize that it is all over my arm and elbow as well. I finally made it out of the bathroom with Cayley, both of us clean, but by no means is my bathroom! It is clean now, I went back in and rinsed the car seat, took over the cover and threw it in the washer with her clothes... Jorge ate dinner and then chilled on the couch while I was doing my best to not lose any more of my dinner... I won't be using prune juice EVER again. I think I will bring the bottle, minus two ounces, over to OldLadyNeighbor.

No comments: